Milestone #1
The online disinhibition effect, an overall term that seems intense to even think about. The idea that you are enabled to constrict yourself from expressing yourself. Which is insane to think of you put yourself in a position online where the sense of anonymity can change, the way you perceive and discuss things. Thinking of a time where I have faced the effects of online disinhibition is difficult. Thinking of times where it is easier to say something over social media or an online platform than rather discussing face to face is something tricky. A prime example of this in my eyes, would be every middle school relationship.
I know I am a victim of a middle school “relationship” where I found it so much easier to have a conversation with a boy who I thought was cute at school but when it came to talking to them in person there was absolutely no way I could come face-to-face with them. I remember ever so clearly there was this guy who I would text all the time over Instagram in like seventh grade over my little kindle because I didn’t have a phone at the time. I would giggle with friends at lunch at times, making code names that started with the first letter of their name like “sandwich” or “ice cream” but when my friends would be like “oh look there’s so-and—so”, it would be like a freeze moment. The words only formed as “hi” or at times nothing expect rosy, red checks and myself turning to my friend screaming “seriously guys”.
I feel like the ability as a little teenager to be able to share a conversation with another teen that they have a remote interest in, can be complicated. The anonymity behind the screen blocks the nonverbal cue of the response the other individual has. The question in this case is why, why does communicating online easier that face-to-face? For me the fact that I didn’t have to see the reaction of the other person, to know if they are liking me or not was a big thing. I did not want to look at the guy and be like “oh yeah I like you”, it was scary. Know as I am older, I have been through experience talking to a guy in general. But at the age of around eleven, hiding behind the screen saved you from the humiliation being laughed or embarrassed of if you had a conversation at school. I was talking to my roommate about this, and she agrees even in situations know with people that you aren’t on good terms with, it is easier not to see their initial reaction to what you said. I think as a kid secretly having those late-night facetime calls was even easier than talking in person with a guy. Even though more nonverbal cues, including the tone of voice, pitch, lack of eye contact and seeing the expressions of emotion was easier than when I was face-to-face with them working on a school project for school.
It’s been over four years since I was in middle school, I have grown in the sense where I can talk to a guy face-to-face, which little middle school self would be in shock. I question why at that age does hiding behind an online setting block the feelings of anxiety and embarrassment when talking with a guy? How does communication through social media, via chats or a facetime, make it easier to express personal feeling and emotion towards someone? Does that feeling of true comfort behind a screen talking to someone ever really change overtime? In ways how does technology affect they way we truly connect with one another?
